Ever been caught in the middle of an awkward conversation?
You don’t know what to say, you feel trapped. You can’t wait for it to end.
Corporate worship can feel like this sometimes, right?
No, I’m not here to make fun of specific worship leaders. I’m not here to label you as awkward. But I do believe there is too much at stake for us to be a hindrance rather than a help to worship.
Your church doesn’t need you to be a rockstar. They don’t need you to be the best in world. They don’t even need you to impress them. They just need you to create a safe place.
Is Your Leadership Safe?
This last week I finished a fascinating book called “This is Your Brain On Music” by Daniel J. Levitin. He offers compelling, scientific proof about the power of music and how it affects our brains.
I didn’t read this book to improve my worship leading. I was simply curious about the topic and how it might help me as a teacher. But I couldn’t help but be challenged by a couple of points. I thought this was an incredibly powerful insight into why people trust the artists they love:
“Even when music doesn’t transport us to an emotional place that is transcendent, music can change our mood. We might be understandably reluctant, then, to let down our guard, to drop our emotional defenses, for just anyone. We will do so if the musicians and composer make us feel safe. We want to know that our vulnerability is not going to be exploited.”
Wow. So much to draw from this.
I think pastors and worship leaders need to be reminded how vulnerable worship is. It’s an act of complete self-denial – trusting in Christ as our source. It’s a killer of pride – not caring what other people think. It’s an awkward ritual to stand shoulder to shoulder with a room full of strangers and sing together – weird stuff.
Those of us in leadership can’t forget how awkward this really is for people. Sure, if you were raised in the church or have been a part of it for years it feels natural. But there are a lot of people attending our churches for whom it is anything but natural.
We need to create a safe place for spectators to grow as worshipers.
Worship requires that we let down our guard and drop our emotional defenses. True worship is coming face to face with reality – face to face with the beauty of God.
But people won’t go to this vulnerable place if they don’t trust the leader – if they don’t feel safe.
Worship leader, let me ask you – is your leadership style safe or awkward? Pastoral or reckless? Face the facts – do you make people feel uncomfortable?
This type of honest gut check may just be what you need to become a better leader. The presence of God may be strong. Your team may sound amazing. But your church may not be engaging because they don’t feel safe doing so. There’s a lack of trust.
3 Things Your Congregation Needs From You
So what does a church need from their worship leader?
1. Realize the vulnerability you’re calling them into – realize that there are a lot of different people at different points on their faith journey. Just because someone isn’t raising their hand doesn’t mean they’re not engaging. They may be engaging at the level they know how.
2. Be vulnerable yourself – You can’t expect people to abandon themselves in worship if you won’t. Or if you’re distant. Your vulnerability calls out to others, helping them become vulnerable too. This is why an engaged, real, passionate worship team is so important. We can’t lead if we’re not going anywhere.
Daniel Levitin makes a great point in his book:
“One of the reasons that we’re willing to make ourselves vulnerable to our favorite musicians is that they often make themselves vulnerable to us (or they convey vulnerability through their art). The power of art is that it can connect us to one another, and to larger truths about what it means to be alive and what it means to be human.”
3. Make people feel safe – Build trust with the people you lead. You build trust by being relatable, vulnerable, and easy to follow. Don’t just perform for people. Don’t over-exhort. Encourage, challenge, shine a spotlight on the cross and get out of the way.
Maybe as you read this blog post about trust and safety you thought about the Chronicles of Narnia. There’s a conversation between Lucy & Mr. Beaver that is one of the most quoted of the entire series. Lucy, here, is inquiring about Aslan after hearing that he is a lion:
“Then he isn’t safe?” said Lucy.
“Safe?” said Mr. Beaver. “Don’t you hear what Mrs. Beaver tells you? Who said anything about being safe? ‘Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the King, I tell you.”
Of course, following Jesus isn’t always safe. He calls us to take up our cross, to deny ourselves. But as a leader I want to lead people to Jesus, not myself. I want to draw attention to His perfection, not my performance.
Whether by my talent or my lack of it, I don’t want people to miss Jesus. Because when it’s all said and done, that is what every heart needs more than anything.
What are your thoughts on this? How do you create a safe environment for your church to connect with God? You can leave a comment by clicking here.
[ois skin=”Beyond Sunday 2″]
Oh my goodness… What a WONDERFUL POST!!! I loved it… Being raised in the church, and loving JESUS more than anything in this world, it is easy for me to worship… Love to lift my hands high and unashamedly praise the LORD… But as I look out every Sunday to a church full of people not worshiping “like me”.. I often pray and ask …”Lord, do they feel anything”? It’s not about how our team sounds or what songs we sing Sunday to Sunday.. I want to see people connect with the heartbeat of God.. I want them to experience what is true and real in my life.. It never fails when I feel this way, that after church someone who “appeared” to be not receptive at all, will come to me and say…….”that song touched my heart”, or “that song was for me today”.. or “the Lord knew I needed it”…. While I am not a fabulous or educated musician or singer, the Lord has called me to lead worship, and I will be obedient. I too, feel it is so important to connect with the congregation. One way I do that is to make sure I am available to meet and greet people before church. This past Sunday I had a new idea to walk around and take church “selfies” with people..LOL.. In a church running 400 plus, it is hard to remember names but nothing helps with that better than taking a quick pic and asking their name so you can tag them in it… Once you do that, it will be easier next week to say “Good morning Julie, how is your family today? good to see you this morning.”Always looking for ways to be real, and touchable, and SAFE.. Once you do that or something similar, it is so helpful in building relationships…
You learn that not everyone worships the same… It is OK to lift your hands, jump up and down, clap and be joyful…. It is also OK to stand there quietly with a butterfly in your stomach or your heart beating out of your chest, or a silent little tear run down your face……As long as they feel Jesus…… It doesn’t matter………
Wow, so many great things here, Debby. I love that you’re stepping out and connecting with people in such a personal way every week. I love this – “It is OK to lift your hands, jump up and down, clap and be joyful…it is also OK to stand there quietly with a butterfly in your stomach or your heart beating our of your chest, or a silent little tear run down your face.” So well said!
I used to play golf with a buddy who would ask me if I breathed in or out when I hit the golf ball–JUST as I was about to swing.
This article reminds me of this undue and ill-timed pressure.
I am in a performance setting, intrinsically designed to draw attention to my (and my praise band) performance, Yet I am supposed to focus on his perfection?
Maybe this is why I and all the people feel awkward and don’t know if they are to breath in or out when they “worship.”? I don’t know either.
I can lead them in a song and I can encourage them to worship God, but I cannot for the life of me lead worship. I tell our people this and they understand. I hope this doesn’t make them insecure and less vulnerable. This is a lot for me to try and juggle. I am not sure this is what I signed up for–making people miss Jesus and all. Heavy burden.
Thanks for helping me confess my insecurities in all this.
Hey Glenn – I wouldn’t be too hard on yourself. It’s often those times where we feel most insecure that God does a great work. Trust him in your weakness. And why would you think people are “missing” Jesus?
I initially worshipped in my heart with no outward signs. I watched the worship team raise their hands and get lost in worship and I was touched. I personally feared that if I raised my hands and somebody I knew walked in and saw me, I would just die. Over time, His presence just drew me in and I got past my pride. I longed to be free to raise my hands. One day I threw a fleece out and told God, “If they play through that song one more time, I will raise my hands.” Unfortunately, they moved to the next song. A intense longing burned inside of me to raise my hands, and thought that I missed my opportunity that day. Part way into the next song, the worship leader said, “I feel like the Holy Spirit is leading me to have us go back and do that last song again.” I immediately raised my hands and have been free ever since. Thank God for the leader who was willing to follow the Spirit’s leading that day. I’ve learned this much…Exalt Him and His presence will come in a powerful tangible way. I now just love and trust the One who knows and loves me best. We serve an amazing God who deserves the glory…because it’s His.
Denise, thanks for being open with your story. As you shared it reminded me of the first time I wanted to lift my hands. I really wanted to reach out – to take a step closer to Jesus but I was too concerned with what people thought of me. Today, there’s no hesitation. But I think as leaders we need to remember what’s it like to worship God for the first time. It will make us better leaders.
A great reminder David, thank you! I never had a hard time raising my hand during worship but dancing and jumping around always seemed a little fake to me. However, I was at a worship conference and the leader challenged us to raise our hands and just start dancing as a response to Christ’s love for us. As we sang the song, it felt really awkward at first, I was afraid someone would be watching me but the leader encouraged everyone to have their eyes closed. What began as an awkward and somewhat uncoordinated attempt to dance in worship became such a freeing experience as I let myself worship God with my whole being. It was such a powerful experience and has given me new freedom as both a worshipper and worship leader.
Love it!
The timing of this post is, dare I say, supernatural. Thanks, David, for this fantastically apropos challenge.
You’re very welcome! Why is the timing supernatural? Just curious 🙂
Over the past couple of weeks I’ve been doing a great deal of wrestling with my role as a worship leader, partly as a byproduct of preparing to teach my church’s youth group about worship (and attempt to repair some hurt feelings many of them had in the wake of a local worship event they attended). This all culminated in that time of teaching this past Sunday, which God chose to bless beyond my expectation.
You hit on so many of the same themes and conclusions that I taught on, both in terms of what worship is and what my role as a leader is… It was simply uncanny. Okay, so maybe “supernatural” would have been if you wrote this post a week ago and saved me some soul searching altogether. 🙂
But in truth, the journey for me was worth at least as much as the destination.
EXCELLENT post! I’ve found that sometimes simply explaining what the song means to me personally, particularly if it is a new song, helps people see me as vulnerable and in the same boat as them (not simply singing a song). Thanks for the thought provoking post…love it!
Thanks for this post, it really blessed me! I’ve been on the worship team at my church for 4 years. I’ve been involved in worship of some sort for 20 years. I’ve always dealt with fear in every area of my life. Long story short, I deal with fear of leading songs at my local church b/c I do not want to be “seen.” If I could lead the song behind stage with no on looking at me I’d be fine. You are so right that it is a vulnerable place. I just want people to see Jesus and get closer to the heartbeat of God. I want them to be set free for any bondage holding them back….all the while I deal with my own bondage of fear and thoughts of why me…am I worthy to lead these precious people!? I worry that b/c I do not “lead” songs a lot that they will stop and listen b/c it’s someone “new” who doesn’t lead often. God spoke to me and said…”don’t give them anything to listen to or watch….keep it simple and worship me.” God has my back, He’s called me to worship. Thanks for the post! I really got a lot out of it <3
What a fresh perspective! Thanks for sharing this. I must say I never considered this even though I’ve led worship and seen others lead worship. I belong to the category of being comfortable in the worship atmosphere for 16 years now. Newcomers would certainly feel awkward though. I like your suggestion of being relatable and easy to follow. I’m also particularly struck by the idea of being vulnerable through my art. I’m a keyboardist, and the next time I play, I’m going to think about how I should be playing in a more vulnerable manner (possibly to play with an even more worshipful heart) – or, if you have some thoughts on how to share this, I’d love to learn more. Thanks, David!
I want people to experience God like I have & still experiencing Him. I want people to embrace His love & love on Him. I want people to stop being afraid to go deeper in Christ. And that’s what I try to show when I lead worship to create that safe place.
Thanks for letting me share.
Marketta