[This is Part 1 of a two part series on Helping your Volunteers Feel Valuable & Significant. Check out Part 2 here.]
Dear Worship Leader,
I’m a volunteer on your worship team.
Not sure if you remember me.
This might be hard to swallow, but I’m going to be stepping down from the team.
I know you probably hate me right now, but it’s just not working out.
Instead of just leaving, I thought I’d write you this personal letter explaining why I’m leaving. Maybe it could be of benefit to you. Thanks:
1. You don’t communicate with the team very well
Sometimes weeks will go by and I don’t hear from you. I feel lost because I don’t know what is going on – am I off the team? Did I do something wrong? It makes me feel that you don’t like me that much. I really look up to you but when I don’t hear from you, I feel undervalued.
Maybe try and steward your communication a little better. If you don’t want me on the team or think I should work on something, please just tell me.
2. I don’t feel challenged
I’ll admit, I tend to be a self-centered musician. But I really like to be challenged. I like to be used in my full capabilities, and honestly, the music here has become a little uninspiring to me. Don’t misunderstand me, I know it’s about Jesus and engaging people in worship but I just feel like I’m not needed.
You never ask my opinion or draw on my experience as a musician. I kinda feel like you’re using me to just pull off your services. I would appreciate it if I was respected for what I know and could offer my input at times.
3. You don’t have much of a vision
I remember when you first asked me to play on the worship team. I was excited – really pumped to have the opportunity to use my gift for the glory of God and lead people in worship. But that was it. I never heard much more about your vision after that. It became all about me being scheduled and doing what you wanted.
It felt like your vision was strong at one point but then faded. I used to love it when you challenged us to worship apart from our instruments and lead the way into the presence of God. Are you still as passionate for God as you used to be?
4. You’re all business and no fun
I honestly thought that joining a worship team would be fun. That we’d goof off together, laugh, and be there when each other was down. But it’s just become about the business of getting worship done. You never ask me how I’m doing or take any interest in my life apart from being scheduled when you need me.
If you would take an interest in me as a person, I’d be more inclined to take part in your team and stay committed. Please don’t take this as a total slam. I wish you all the best.
Sincerely,
Worship Team Volunteer
I understand that people leave our ministry for ridiculous reasons and it’s impossible to please everyone. A lot of people don’t leave in a respectable manner. But that’s not the point.
The point is that we steward our worship team members well – that we err on the side of over-communication, challenge and trust them, believe and breathe a vision worth dying for, and remember to have fun.
We want our worship team members to leave for the right reasons – not because we’re poor managers, but because they’ve developed a passion for worship, grown their gifts, and are being sent out to make a difference somewhere else.
Question: what are some other ways we can care for our volunteers more effectively? How can we help them feel valuable and significant? You can leave a comment by clicking here.
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Very interesting angle David. Great insights too. Thanks for these thoughts.
Thanks Chris
No stop it … Ur thinkin rong . U talented being.dont u think god new the gift he was giving u. Stop thinkin and let the holy spirit lead you.dont you no it has neva been abot how talentd we are but how we love him our saviour.i no how much u love the lord too much.u want only the best and that is wonderful and he nos it
And somtimes the more of tune we are and how rong we are is exactly wat he wants to hear
We all try in wat ever way
Isnt that wat grace is abot.
Weda u get wat u want 4rom yor team is not important.u comited to him.do it only for him
He is worthy.how many wish they had yor gift.weda u feel yor pastor does not care or yor team jus are not on the same level as u. is not yor problem
Praise him like paul wile in prison. The love of jesus is in you.go read. Philemon and wat paul did for a slave
It is a love letter .do it humble yorself.do not loose wat god has for u
Just stop thinkin abot yorself..theres a song that goes we wont be satisfied with anything ordinary we dont want blessings we want you.it will and alwayz be a him and i love it no mata wat. Oh love u and dont think i dont undetstand i learnt this painfully.stay blesd
Its not about us, you are right. But each person needs to feel valued and wanted on the team. Wee are people who need people. Wee are supposed to encourage each other and help each other grow. I am a lonely worship team member. This article perfectly expresses my heart. I feel like a lonely musician. Its like to grow with my team. I’d like my position to grow as well. It cannot when you’re not connecting.
Sounds like someone is worshiping the worship leader to me. Yeah he is all buiznass because unlike you he is at work. You wouldn’t expect a plumber to do anything but plumb while he is on the clock. And off the clock you would probably hafto go to him to chill and have fellowship on his terms. If you have never played music for $ then you should try it. If you aren’t “good” enough to do it then maybe you should question why you aren’t challenged to improve within the structure of the songs that bore you. If you are good enough then do that else where and serve the church sacrificialy by choosing to “place the cookies on the bottom shelf” for the old ladies in the back so they can worship as well.
Wow! very sobering David (in a good way) – I think #1 is the root of a lot of friction in teams, just my two cents.
I agree, Jason. I’ve been there!
I will save this…great material!
Thanks Nathan!
Great post Dave. I think it’s vital to pray together & text/call/hang out outside of weekend services/rehearsals.
Agreed, Kate!
Really creative post, love it. OK – this is so dead on
#1 Leaders need to treat people right. A lot of times “it’s just become about the business of getting worship done” We have to put ourselves in our volunteers shoes. They are busy and stressed out, so that extra rehearsal blows up their lives … keep the demands of being part of the team reasonable …
#2 There are seasons when volunteers need a sabbatical break. Plan for this up front. 3 months on / 3 months off works for some. There’s lots of ways to do that, have it be part of the culture.
Good insights, Rob. It really does help to slow down and put yourself in their shoes.
Good stuff.
I think the main problem is about expectations–when the worship team member has different ones than the leadership. The goal is to serve the congregation first, not the comfort of the leader or the team member–the source of most conflict.
For instance, when the congregation loves a song, the band is already bored with it. I choose being bored to help people worship. The key in this example and perhaps in most is simply being honest that preferences come second to the people we serve.
It is not about a musical outlet. It is ministry. This is the hardest and best thing to teach a team. After all, pros do the same tunes under terrible touring circumstances for years on end. Why do worship people feel so entitled?
Awesome stuff, Rich. It’s so important that our worship teams view it more than just a gig, isn’t it? That’s a great question about why we feel entitled. I wonder if it’s because many volunteer church musicians never had the chance to live out their rockstar fantasies of big music and big stages. Maybe the entitlement stems from that among other things?
Awesome points Rich. I love your comment about “I choose being bored…” great insight.
Great stuff Dave!
You’re great stuff, Shay! 🙂
I recently starting reading your blog and have appreciated your varied topics and content. I don’t blog myself and have just begun reading a few others so I’m really new and don’t understand a lot of acronyms and stuff but I’m learning (the url above… yeah I don’t know what that is) Thanks for being an encouragement to me. This post especially helped remind me to care for the team which God has graciously given to me.
Welcome to the community, Gregg. It’s an honor to have you! If you ever have questions about anything, feel free to ask!
So good. My cousin is a worship leader at a rapidly growing church. They hit hard and fast in terms of team responsibility and requirements. He has opened up the church early to offer free breakfast to the team. Breakfast is the most inexpensive meal to buy, so it it is lighter on the budget. He has created a loyal team and has been able to ask more from them than any other leader I have seen. Not sure I can share those deets. Another important aspect is be early and be prepared. This shoes you value your band’s time and families. It also shows that you can be trusted. Lastly, I would intentionally schedule times to build rapport with my team. I would pick a few people and contact them through a few different means. Facebook, twitter, text, call, email, etc. When I was interning about five years ago, my worship leader stopped me in the hall way after the service. I had made a habit of changing strings on stage if they broke and packing up his gear and carrying it to his office. One particular night he stopped me in the hallway, looked me in the eye and simply said, “You are more important to me as a friend than what you do for me.” That was the greatest thing a leader has ever told me.
Wow. I typed shoes instead of shows.
whoah!..another article that hit me hard!..especially point no.3!..it’s as if i am the one writing those!..yeah,honestly, am beginning to have these feelings/thoughts towards my team. and i hope this blog, the articles here, would really help me in this period of thinking, pondering and praying about my involvement in the ministry – that it would not come to a point that i could/would say am stepping down, because seriously i never really would not want that to happen at all.i love serving God thru this ministry!
Sweet stuff Santistevan! haha and of course there are those who decide to step down and we go “phew! no need to be darth vadar!” 😀 jkjk…but really 😀
Haha!
Hi guys, a few of my Youth friends, started a youth worship team and we’ve lead worship all across our city.
In the beginning i was passionate because it was centred around seeing people worshiping God, now its about we should play Jesus Culture or Hillsong united songs and when i start going prophetic and spontaneous they hesitate and dont really like it, which really discourages me. My heart for the band has really died and I know God is calling me to something else. Im scared to leave the band and be on my own, any advice?
Have you talked to your band mates about your concerns?
Hello Abongile. Let’s make sure that what you are feeling isn’t simply a word for you to deepen your roots in the Word, prayer or your relationship with Jesus. We can often feel so passionately that we essentially take this out on those around us. However, I believe entire churches are in the same position you are. It seems our mainstream scene has moved into being concerned with sounding like the flavor of the week. I would go to the leader of the band and tell them this. You appreciate your relationship first and foremost, but you feel that God is calling the team to go broader and you feel that you are in a season where you need to go deeper. There has to be honest and open communication, but do not take an accusational tone or elite spirit. God calls us all into the wilderness at some point, and we have to go into it with a free heart. Hope that helps.
Its still me,Hey David yes i have raised up these concerns on alot of occassionsto the band and it becomes the same thing… I’m 19 and I love ministry and its something that God has called me 2, theres still ALOT i need to learn and experience
Jerret, I would say that my relationship with Jesus is sometimes challenged but i always go back to him. An issue in our band is that people get offended and get defensive, people have dated and broken up in the band, there have been major disagreements. I ask myself where are we putting God in all of this, coz in the beginning this was not the vision we had for the band. Its also a case where musicians get better and they forget the purpose and why we do what we do. Been praying about this!
Have you considered an internship at a church or in a worship ministry? That may be a great next step if you are really wanting to pursue ministry. That way you are getting the training and experience you need for longevity, but also with like minded peeps.
Haha well actually next year, im interning at my church for the whole of 2012 and studying theology, then in 2013 I will be studying Worship Ministry at Hillsong college
Hey A-jile!
So pumped to hear that you are planning on studying Worship Ministry at Hillsong College.
I myself went there for the entire 3 year program – and I could not believe how much I have learned from that place. You get to sit under incredible leadership and really learn what it means to be a part of the body of Christ. Not just to be A church… but THE church!
Don’t forget that there isn’t just one way to do things. Although Hillsong has obviously had much success in their various ministries (especially music!), their way is not the ONLY way. Always make sure you go to God and ask HIM what is right for where you are. I’ve been home for just about 2 years now and it is the most important lesson I have learned since!
If you have any questions at all relating to Hillsong College, please feel free to ask. I would love to be able to help you in any way I can!
Interesting. 🙂
Yeah, im super excited about it, thanks for your help guys, is there any other way we can keep in contact?
A-jile, have you subscribed to the posts on this blog? I’ve found this is the best way to keep in contact because we can continue having worship-related conversations every day I post something. Check it out here: http://davidsantistevan.com/subscribe
Sure. And this goes for anyone who ever wants to talk about Jesus and worship ministry. Jerrethammons@gmail.com
Diva!
With regards to the forth point, it becomes very difficult to balance focus with fun, because more than often, worship members tend to prefer all fun, and rehearsals become difficult to control, as more time is wasted on unnecessary chats and jokes, which then leads to a long rehearsal with minimal outcome.
I for one like a to share a joke or two and allow a relaxed atmosphere, but some people take it that I don’t have charge and there is just plain chaos in the worship team.
This is a good point, Seshupo. How far is too far as it relates to joking? I think it’s important but your team needs to know when it is time to get down to business as well 🙂
i’m in choir that was a part of the worship team, i quit from the team cos i got the feeling that i’m not appreciated by them, example: worship team will tell choir what color to wear on friday, sometimes even on saturday morning, while the service is on saturday evening … i think it’s a small thing, you don’t need to pray first to choose what color to wear in the service, yet they like to inform that at the last moment
Spotlights on musicians and singers? Please, the church needs to be different from the world, not conform to it. And teams? When did worship become a sport? We really need to immerse ourselves in the Word of God and seek him and his will, not our own. Let’s sing his songs – perhaps they are in his Word for a reason. Let us strive for humility, unity and reverence for God.
Love in Christ,
Leslie
Hi all!
Leslie:
I agree, humility is huge for worship team members.
It is easy for me to think too highly of my own ideas and opinions.
Best,
Gary L
Southern NH (U.S.)