Can’t we all just get along?
Is it possible for a young worship leader to connect with someone twice or three times their age?
Is the older generation immature for not worshiping? Is the younger generation immature for not caring?
I’m convinced we should do all it takes to see the generations stand together in worship.
A couple of weeks ago we talked about how you work to engage an older generation in worship. Today I wanted to distill these answers in an easy-to-use guide.
I have recently been giving this a lot of thought. I’ve also been investing a lot of my energy into getting better at it.
If you are young, you need to be asking this question. At some point in your worship leading journey you will be leading for people who are older than you – those who don’t like your music and have a hard time following what you do.
5 Tips For Engaging The Older Generation
You need to wrestle with this. Here are 5 tips you can start implementing this weekend:
1. Utilize a skilled sound engineer
We who are young and dumb tend to think there’s an inherent glory about loud music. Well, loud doesn’t always mean better. Without a skilled mixer, your music is probably too loud and too harsh. Loud for loudness’ sake is never a good idea.
A skilled sound engineer can take your crazy music and mix it in a way that sounds more pleasing – more full. This won’t fix all your problems, but it will go a long way in creating a more pleasing experience for people in the room.
2. Teach new songs simply
Most people who attend church aren’t looking for a concert. They are either appeasing their religious conscience or want to meet with God. So your perfectly arranged, super-charged songs won’t always connect.
Before you launch into your arrangement, teach the new song in a simple, stripped down, conversational style. It shows that you’re slowing down to connect with people rather than blowing right by them.
3. Utilize hymns & older choruses
Rather than just sucking up and “throwing them a bone”, learn to appreciate hymns and older choruses. They really do breathe a breath of fresh air into your worship set.
Make them a part of your worship leading. Go so far as to even talk about what a particular hymn has meant to you. The elder will feel valued and connected to you all the more.
4. Foster loving relationships off the stage
A great point was made in the comments of the last post. Many of the older generation feel they are being passed by. They don’t feel valued. So they often react in less than desirable ways to get attention.
We as young worship leaders should make deliberate effort to connect with them off the stage. Develop those relationships. Be there to hang out on Sunday. Listen. Make conversation. Be a pastor.
5. Choose songs with God-centered lyrics
The older generation appreciates rock solid truth in lyrics. And you should too. Review last week’s set list. How many of the songs you led were about God? How many were about your passion for God?
Choose Bible saturated, theologically accurate songs that make much of God. If an unbeliever were to walk into your worship service would they see that you were impressed with God or impressed with your own worship?
These tips won’t solve the war, but they will go a long way in showing the older generation that you care.
Question: What other lessons have you learned in leading worship for multiple generations? You can leave a comment by clicking here.
You had me at number 3 david…
I’m a huge supporter of the hynms!
I’m my generation is inclining to this more and more…thanks to passion, tomlin, david crowder band….
i love singing these songs now…as a kid i never really paid attention to them…
The younger generation is tough to engage…but if you can do it right…it can be down…
usually i will do it a whole new way…THEN…at the end…die down to just guitar and piano…and sing it like that…really fosters to both younger and older generations…the ones that are really there to worship…
Arny, do you think reaching the younger generation is simply a matter of style or are other factors involved?
I think it’s mostly style…but you have to do it right…in my opinion…you play the style…put you slow it down and just worship…with the same song…even if it’s a hymn…
it’s like say…hey, that was fun playing but lets just focus on what we are really singing and saying to our amazing God…
Remember, the holy spirit has no age group…it will touch whom he wants to touch…slowing the music down and just playing it with just one instument…really brings focus….
It’s saying to the younger and older generation…it doesnt matter how we play it…the main focus is…worshiping our King…with these words…
I know saying “style” only is rude…but If i’m being Honest…that is why i never really paid attention to them to begin with when i was younger…
it’s a harsh fact…
I love #3. There are so many incredible songs that get ignored because “They’re ooooold”. The constant thirst for “progress” ignores the treasures of the past. I was giving a good worship leader friend of mine grief because he had never even HEARD of Rich Mullins. He came to Christ after Rich died, y’see…. And Keith Green wrote songs that never lose their lyrical power. Change the arrangement, sure! But don’t just leave ’em behind because they “sound old”. And I absolutely love hymns. Yes I do. 😀
Agreed, Jennifer. I think there always needs to be a healthy balance of new and old.
I totally agree that the important thing is to not lose the focus. We should be leading by example and that our focus remain on Christ and His worthiness of our worship and praise. Balancing style is the challenge. I have been told by the older generation in our church that it is not that they don’t like the “new” stuff, it is all in how it is presented. If it is presented in a way where there is no interaction with them and just a “performance” it is hard for them to connect with what is going on. So presentation is important. The treasures in the “old” stuff will never lose their value. To be able to work all of these together will help the whole congregation engage. In the end our goal is to bring the focus to worshiping God and really sensing His presence in our midst.
Great point, Sandi. Congregations don’t like to be played at. They’re not there for a concert. They want to meet with God. It’s important that we don’t just plow through our arrangements.
Hey David I expanded on your point 5 on the point below. I talk about one potential cause – the song’s focus – on us or on God, and how that might resonate with older generations.
http://www.weekendwarriorworship.com/can-keeping-the-main-thing-the-main-thing-help-bridge-the-worship-generation-gap/
Love this post, Mark! Thanks for sharing.
I loved the dialogue on your initial post and this follow-up post is fantastic. This list is so simple it’s stupid. But that’s the beauty of the blogging community – it creates opportunity to share easier ways of doing things we previously struggled with.
Thanks, friend!
Great recommendations David. Some comments per point:
#1 – Older ears are physically more sensitive to harsh frequencies so not only have your engineer adjust accordingly, but do the same with your arrangements, especially mellow out the crunchy guitar sound
#2 “teach the new song in a simple, stripped down, conversational style.” Absolutely this is a brilliant method:
#3 I would try to include older songs/hymns that have meaning for your churches unique history and context. Not just an old song that you picked because you liked it. I think we show respect to this demographic when we do this to bless them, not win “good will”
#4 Absolutely develop healthy relationships off stage. I would regularly visit our Seniors luncheon and sing a song or two, and just have conversation with them. Be genuinely interested in them as people with a significant story. They will be your best advocates.
#5 God centered. Yes. Easy also helps.
Final thoughts. Sonically, if you include breakdown moments in your songs, and give them air to breath, your more mature worshipers will rise up and sing louder because they’re not fighting the band.
Hey David,
Thanks so much for your article. Very good stuff. I am a 39 year old professional musician (keys) with a heart primarily in music ministry…
I do have a question for you – a bit off topic but kind of connected – maybe you have some insight.
Our church worship pastor does not have anyone older than 39 on the platform as a rule. End of story. (He is 28). Also not an open call to those in the body who God has called to music ministry. Just the same team with a couple of subs every week.
Also observing and hearing more and more from churches recently on how the youth/younger generation in music ministry will not engage with or “mix” with anyone musically over age 35 or 40.
The crazy thing is – I see where there could be mentoring taking place from older musicians in the area of musical skill and even spiritual guidance/wisdom. The Bible speaks of the older men & women mentoring the younger ones – and in the area of music and worship is no exception.
I love the charisma and passion of the teens to early 20-year-olds! Love it! Love that they are leading! But along with that somehow it seems there are walls up when it comes to being mentored musically or how to be effective on a team by anyone qualified who is “old”.
My heart is heavy because of this.
Makes me wonder if part of it was the older generations (and I am not talking 30′ & 40’s here)…older than that – not wanting anything to do with the youth and their “loud” music when that started to enter the church worship style in the late 90’s…
and a rift of sorts has been created.
Services divided up – for “traditional” vs “youth”….and then a “contemporary” service for all those in between. Good grief!
I suppose because I am 39 and apparently lumped in (so it seem) by the youth to be “old” – I am starting to experience the walls that are up. I love the new worship music & styles that are out! And I love playing them and learning the songs! Truth is – I would love nothing more than to coach and mentor the young keyboardists…
But age is like some sort of black mark so it seems.
Anyway – just some thoughts. Trying to understand all view points to see how we can all come together as one body across the generations and worship together!
God Bless!
Suzanne, I feel your pain. Have you ever talked to your worship pastor about his “over 39” rule? I don’t want to discredit his leadership here, as he may have good reasons for this. But saying no just because they are older isn’t a good enough excuse. I agree, I think good mentoring can take place on both sides. The old(er) can teach the young and the young can teach the old(er) about the new styles. It’s just very rare that the generations are that open and patient with one another. How do you think we can bridge the gap?
David , Suzanne has pinpointed a common problem. I have been noticing the same things about age. I think this is part of the issue, see if you agree. Anyone relatively new in leadership (meaning young) wants to take charge and do things their own way. Don’t we call that youthful zeal?
Contrast; talented, intelligent, educated, experienced people (meaning old) are not void of opinions. It seems easier for the young to avoid us than to engage us. We have become another “brick” in their wall. Ha ha, or LOL, whatever! Like you said about the Amy Grant concert,”don’t judge me”.
I must say, these are generalizations, but I do see it as a growing trend. I think you said before ,it is not a problem to be fixed, but a tension to be managed. Sometimes we say that if we were all lead by the Holy Spirit, we would not have these problems. I am beginning to believe that the tension caused by the group differences is part of the growing and creating process. We should embrace it. We need to respect each other and move forward, but all in all what would it actually be like if everyone agreed all the time? Be careful what you wish for.
Old or young is another “us and them”. If you are 20 something, what is old? 40? 60? 80? You want a new worship recording, PA system, keyboard,,, whatever, who has all the money? Who built the Church, and funds its functions? Ooooooold people.
Also this tension didn’t start in the late 90’s, it started in the 60’s. I said once before, the baby boomers started the generation gap. Payback is here, let us beg for forgiveness.
One last point, the Bible says there is nothing new under the sun. Mainstream music has not changed in 40 years. What we call Contemporary Christian,(except for lyric content) is nothing but Classic Folk Rock. The more things change, the more they stay the same.
This rant was actually fun Don
I agree, Don. We need each other, both the old and young. It takes a lot of maturity to realize that.