When was the last time you were 100% focused on what you were doing in the moment?
If you’re like me, you hardly even know what that is.
We’re so worried about tomorrow, we lack the focus to make a difference today.
Just last week, I showed up to my worship team rehearsal anxious. I was thinking about what I needed to do on Tuesday while trying to lead my team that day. Suffice it to say I didn’t perform or lead at my best.
The reason this intrigues me so much is I’m tired of being stressed.
I’m tired of showing up to my band rehearsals, leadership meetings, and worship services tense.
I’m tired of being in the same room with my wife while I make out with my laptop.
I want to lead with a calm confidence, be present, and do everything on purpose.
What about you?
Goals. Planners. Scheduling. All these tools train our minds to be somewhere we are not. While it’s important to look into the future, we can’t forget about what is right before us.
Stressing about tomorrow will diminish your effectiveness today.
5 Tips For Living In The Moment
Here are 5 habits I’m trying to grow in every day:
1. Plan to the best of your ability
Living in the present is not an excuse for poor planning. Actually, if you want to be as relaxed as possible, you’ll need to plan well.
Look out a year in advance. Mark appointments and events on your calendar. My church uses Google calendar where I can view staff member’s calendars and also main event and facilities calendars.
Know what’s on your schedule and review it weekly. Define your goals and schedule how you’ll accomplish them. I use Action Method to plan my daily tasks.
2. Schedule your social media interaction
Nothing kills “living in the moment” more than constant social media communication. The iPhone has been the life and death of me. It’s an unmatched productivity tool but also a constant stress inducer. Email, Twitter, Facebook, and blog comments are at my disposal 24/7.
At my worst, I check it first thing in the morning, mid-morning, lunch, afternoon, at dinner with my wife, and as I lay in bed. Shame on me.
In order to live in the present you need to schedule your social media interaction. When it’s not scheduled, put it away. Give your spouse your undivided attention. Play with your kids and enjoy every moment. Be present with whomever you are, wherever you are.
If you have a smartphone, learn to ignore it. If you don’t, I would suggest not getting one.
3. Only think about what you’re doing
My problem with this past weekend was worrying about Tuesday while I executed Sunday. Never a good idea. I’m reminded of the challenge in Matthew 6:
“Therefore do not be anxious about for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble”.
So true. As my pastor always says, you will have grace for tomorrow when tomorrow comes. Today, you have sufficient grace for today.
When you find yourself worrying about tomorrow, ignore it and refocus. Keep doing this as often as you need to. If you’re planning and reviewing your schedule well, you have nothing to worry about. You’ll accomplish what you need to in its time.
4. Improve your conversation skills
The main goal of living in the present is being more available to people – to listen well, have great conversations, and shift your obsession with yourself onto another. This is an acquired skill.
I like to see every conversation and interaction as a way to change someone’s life. Here are a few quick tips:
- Don’t talk about yourself (really…just don’t do it)
- Make unbroken eye contact. Resist the urge to look around.
- Think hard about what they are saying. Empathize with their feelings.
- Ask deeper questions related to what they are saying. Don’t shift the topic of conversation.
- Don’t give advice unless they ask. Coach them by asking questions.
5. Slow down and notice the grandeur of God
Nothing will cause you to relax faster than glimpsing the glory of God. If I’m honest, I’m usually too busy to notice.
But when I take the time to look at the sky, peer into a forest, notice the intricacy of a rock’s design, and see how the Almighty sustains creation, I realize what I’m stressing about isn’t that big a deal. I learn to get over it.
So what do you do? Resolve, as Jonathan Edwards used to say, to be amazed by God every day. Look at the world and observe its intricacies. Take a minute to worship. This habit will change your life.
Question: How do you become more present in your everyday life? You can leave a comment by clicking here.
Arny says
I love this David…
What I was going for in the comments the other day is not exclusivly the “stress” of tomorrow, Which is a big one for me and for You as i see, BUT, not the stress at all!
It’s just sorta like the weekend becomes an idol sorta. When I see people status facebook on Monday morning…”is it Friday yet?”….it just sad. and kinda an Insult to God. King David said…
“This is the day that the Lord has made…let us rejoice and be glad in it.”
This is where i was comming from…
Great Thoughts!
Jason says
I must say that I agree with you. It is sad when it is Monday and people are wishing for the weekend. I think that is the essence of wishing our lives away. Thanks for the reminder to be grateful for every day.
David Santistevan says
Yea, the whole “living for the weekend” idea bugs me. If we don’t learn how to be present and love “today”, we’ll never be satisfied with our lives. The weekend comes and goes and we’re still not satisfied, you know?
Ruth Clark says
Thank you David. This is what I appreciate the most about your blog, it challenges me and helps me reflect. Nine times out of ten you hit me too close to home. I don’t have a cell phone, I use my iPod for everything, but even with that I’m hooked on wifi. It helps that I have limited access when I’m out and about. This year has been a turning point for me. I’m working on being more concerned about constant connection to God than to the Internet. I’m glad He’s still working on me. =)
David Santistevan says
Ruth, glad to hear it’s helping. I guess the more honest I can be about myself, the better my blog is 🙂 Do you have any suggestions of more things I could write about?
@Ruth_A_Clark says
I’m just a newbie at blogs and worship training, but… Something you may have done before: a closer look at worshipers and/or songwriters in Scripture. Their occupations and roles they played, relationship with God and effect their praise had, etc. David, Miriam, Paul and Silas first ones that come to mind…..
Jason says
Great post! I think you’ve hit it on the head when you say we need to focus on what we’re doing right now. At. This. Very. Moment. Technology is great and has allowed us to do multi-tasking like never before. Unfortunately, it may have helped to induce ADHD like never before.
After looking back on this post and thinking a bit, I realize that I often tell people how well I’ve gotten at multi-tasking on a computer. I realize, that to a certain point, I should be a little bit ashamed at the fact that I don’t focus on something. Not that I can’t, I definitely have times of intense focus and concentration, but the overall feeling is that of running a hundred miles an hour and not slowing down for anything.
I heard Matt Chandler in a sermon say something to the effect of this: How has being “busy” become the new badge of honor? Shame on us. It made me think, the most common answer for the greeting “Hey how’s it going?” has changed from the typical response of ‘good’ to ‘busy’. Hmm, I don’t think this is the typical respose Jesus intends for us to have.
David Santistevan says
Great insights, Jason. I love matt chandler. His insight is profound.
I’m guilty of the “i’m busy” response!
Ryan Gordon says
I really like that Matt Chandler quote (he is so pro). I agree with you. I’ve been feeling great with my multi-tasking abilities as of late, but you’re absolutely right. It might be time to shut off my phone/computer and just focus on one thing. Great thoughts, Jason.
Jason says
I was looking into this Action Method thing. I was just wondering if it was free or not? Thanks for the info!
David Santistevan says
I believe there’s a free trial period, but it’s not free. I think it comes out to be like $80 a year or something.
Jason says
Thanks. I will check into it. There’s a couple people I know who might be interested in this.
Rob Still says
Looking people in the eye deeply is a great way to be present with them.
Point #2 to schedule social media interaction is a helpful tip. You described me there too …
Love the inspiration from Jonathan Edwards.
David Santistevan says
I always admire a person who can look me in the eye and not get nervous or distracted. I think it says a lot about the person.
Ryan Gordon says
This is a great post, friend. #1 hits the spot for me.
I met with my pastor yesterday for a brief evaluation of how things are going in my area of ministry. While we both agreed I’m doing great with the day-to-day stuff, we also both agreed I could do better with some “big picture” stuff simply by setting time aside on my calendar to work on them.
I would get overwhelmed because I wouldn’t have a whole day to dedicate to some bigger projects, but in reality, if I would just plan out smaller chunks over several weeks, it wouldn’t seem as daunting. It was a great meeting and I wanna get better at how I plan things, both for short-term and long-term goals.